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15/4/13

He creates his own personal brand of “love”. It’s difficult to explain. He loves you more than you ever imagined humanly possible, it’s more of an obsession than a love but simultaneously he installs the tiniest bit of fear that he can take it away at any time. Bit by bit he takes over your life, alienates you from anything and everything else you’ve ever needed. He makes you feel more than anybody else ever has because he is so unbelievably reckless with your heart and causes the kind of pain that cripples you. You mistake these feelings of despair for love. He’ll hurt you and hurt you until you are just a shell of the person you use to be, then he’ll let you go and allow you to lick your wounds. Once you have overcome the period of depression by yourself, once you’re fixed, he’ll open his arms to you again and although you will never know why, you will go back. You will go back every time until you finally have no dignity left and he finally has no respect left for you and then he will leave forever and start this process on the next willing victim whose heart and life he will steal.  

4/4/13

you are running alone
and he tries to tame you
compares you to an impossible highway
to a burning house
says you are blinding him
that he could never leave you
forget you
want anything but you
you dizzy him, you are unbearable
every woman before or after you
is doused in your name
you fill him
he aches with memories
his body is just a long shadow, seeking yours
but you are always too intense
frightening in he way you want him
unashamed and sacrificial
he tells you that no man could live up to the one who
lives in your head
and you tried to change, didn’t you?
closed your mouth more
tried to be softer
prettier
less volatile, less awake
but even when sleeping you could feel
him travelling away from you in his dreams
so what did you want to do love?
spilt his head open?
you can’t make homes out of human beings
someone should have already told you that
and if he wants to leave
then let him leave
you are terrifying
and strange and beautiful
something not everybody knows how to love.

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